Jump to content

  •  

Photo

Harrasment warning issued but not sure why


  • This topic is locked This topic is locked
48 replies to this topic

#1 louise64

louise64

    I'm New !

  • Resident Members
  • 16 posts

Posted 25 October 2012 - 05:54 PM

A wife of an old friend rung me back in May and asked me if i was having an affair with her husband back in May. After i gave her the answer (which was no) she continued to text me for a further three days.And asked me to add her as a friend on a social network site which i did under a false name and account. I then found that over the next few months the woman had googled me, looked for information about me including my childrens names and husband, opened up accounts herself to find information on me, wrote things about me on social networking.Involved her daughter who also slandered my name is full and where i work on a social network site. i tried to inform the police several times but they said they cant do anything as it was a public domain. I then had a visit from the police who told me that i had taken a photograph in a public street of several different vehicles and her car was one of them, They gave me the warning and said if i contacted any of the family again i would be arrested. I spoke to the sergent who said there was no law on taking photos in a public place but because she had made a complaint against me taking the photo and with the comments on both facebook pages even though i had not mentioned any names , i would get into trouble should it go to court as she made the complaint . Is this right ?

#2 louise64

louise64

    I'm New !

  • Resident Members
  • 16 posts

Posted 26 October 2012 - 08:12 AM

Any reply would be helpful . please

#3 SimonT

SimonT

    UKPoliceOnline Staff

  • Moderators
  • 7,290 posts
  • Gender:Male
  • Location:Hampshire
  • Interests:police, climbing

Posted 26 October 2012 - 09:06 AM

People complain about all sorts of nonsense and because we are the police we are expected to do something about it. We cant tell people to grow up because although thats usually the best advice its not victim focused.
So we end up sending people harassment warnings and they get upset. But as they are not the 'victim' its not so important.
Sounds like you have no reason to contact them again so dont. Doing so seems to get you in trouble so dont bother

#4 meditate

meditate

    UKPOLICEONLINE Guru

  • Senior Resident Members
  • 2,902 posts
  • Gender:Male

Posted 26 October 2012 - 09:23 AM

So basically a stranger who asks if you are having an affair with their husband rings you up out of the blue. They then contact you to add them as a friend on a social networking site - Why would you add them (even under a false name)? Also, with regards to the photo of the cars how did you come to photo her car - was it by accident or deliberate? Just curious because if it was me and someones partner rang me up to see if I was having an affair with their other half I would tend to leave them alone.

also what were the comments you made on Facebook and why would you do that?

Edited by meditate, 26 October 2012 - 09:26 AM.


#5 louise64

louise64

    I'm New !

  • Resident Members
  • 16 posts

Posted 26 October 2012 - 09:30 AM

Thank you very much for your reply. i really think because this woman sounds very jealous of me and i work with children too, she is trying to cause a lot of trouble for me, and i was told by her husband she will ruin me. I dont know if this warning is classed as a caution, and will appear on any CRB check? i have no idea about police things. But the sergeant told me that if i took it further that i waould be the one in trouble as i have taken photos with her car apparently on them and that insults were put on FACEBOOK page by both, but i unlike her and her daughter di not mention any names. It seems very unfair.

#6 louise64

louise64

    I'm New !

  • Resident Members
  • 16 posts

Posted 26 October 2012 - 09:37 AM

So basically a stranger who asks if you are having an affair with their husband rings you up out of the blue. They then contact you to add them as a friend on a social networking site - Why would you add them (even under a false name)? Also, with regards to the photo of the cars how did you come to photo her car - was it by accident or deliberate? Just curious because if it was me and someones partner rang me up to see if I was having an affair with their other half I would tend to leave them alone.

also what were the comments you made on Facebook and why would you do that?

. Yes i dont know the woman, i knew who she was as i was in school with her husband and she got my number of his phone. she asked me to add her as i didnt believe it was his wife as it could be anyone really couldnt it,As for the vehicles, i dont drive myself and know nothing about cars , nor what she drives,and it was not a photo of her car it apparently is in the photo from what shes told the polce. i have left her alone and have never contacted her at all , she done all the contacting and as for the Facebook comments werent aimed at her until 2 months ago when i noticed she had commented on there reffering to me, and her husband told me she had been looking for information on me and my family then put it on her wall.

#7 meditate

meditate

    UKPOLICEONLINE Guru

  • Senior Resident Members
  • 2,902 posts
  • Gender:Male

Posted 26 October 2012 - 09:41 AM

The fact you put comments on at all hasnt helped. Have you thought about getting this resolved by the Jeremy Kyle show? They could do a lie detector etc to see if the husband is telling you the truth etc.

#8 louise64

louise64

    I'm New !

  • Resident Members
  • 16 posts

Posted 26 October 2012 - 09:45 AM

The comments werent about her !!!! she just assumed, ans as for the Jeremy Kyle show ,i have never watched it so dont know what its about, but your comment regarding that wasnt very helpful really was it and very childish . Thanks anyway

#9 meditate

meditate

    UKPOLICEONLINE Guru

  • Senior Resident Members
  • 2,902 posts
  • Gender:Male

Posted 26 October 2012 - 09:48 AM

I am saddened you find my advice childish. If you have never seen the programme he manages to get resolution and the truth around disputes, a lot which seem to involve the use of social media - so thought this might be an avenue. Failing that I honestly do not know how you can get this resolved short of ignoring the comments and/or closing your facebook account down.

#10 louise64

louise64

    I'm New !

  • Resident Members
  • 16 posts

Posted 26 October 2012 - 09:58 AM

ive closed that done weeks ago, however even after the police told me that she would be given the same warning , she is still writing things on her wall and putting them public obviously for my attention. yet i was told that if either made any more comments referring to each other we would be arrested. So she seems to be getting away with this doesnt she

#11 SimonT

SimonT

    UKPoliceOnline Staff

  • Moderators
  • 7,290 posts
  • Gender:Male
  • Location:Hampshire
  • Interests:police, climbing

Posted 26 October 2012 - 10:26 AM

If its on her own facebook page she can say pretty much what she wants. Dont look at her page. There you go. If it irritates you enough then secure a solicitor and sue her for libel or speak to facebook.
But its a lot easier to erase her from your life completely so that you never have any connection to her.
Its not a police caution, the fact that it has been issued to you will be held on a local force computer so that if you do start harassing her it can be noted that you have been warned

Mediate: "why would you do that?" One of the most frequently asked questions in policing today.

#12 stewie_griffin

stewie_griffin

    UKPOLICEONLINE Regular

  • Senior Resident Members
  • 923 posts
  • Gender:Male

Posted 26 October 2012 - 02:28 PM

Mediate: "why would you do that?" One of the most frequently asked questions in policing today.


What he said. x 10.

#13 meditate

meditate

    UKPOLICEONLINE Guru

  • Senior Resident Members
  • 2,902 posts
  • Gender:Male

Posted 26 October 2012 - 03:31 PM

What he said. x 10.


I would love to hear some of the answers that were given! Must be one of the best (or exasperating) aspects of the job.

#14 onthesquare28

onthesquare28

    UKPOLICEONLINE Regular

  • Banned
  • 383 posts
  • Gender:Male
  • Location:Thames Valley
  • Interests:Law, current affairs, politics.

Posted 09 November 2012 - 07:25 PM

My advice is as follows:

1. Firsly and most importantly *don't* make anything that is a first approach to the person who is causing you the grief.

2.

#15 onthesquare28

onthesquare28

    UKPOLICEONLINE Regular

  • Banned
  • 383 posts
  • Gender:Male
  • Location:Thames Valley
  • Interests:Law, current affairs, politics.

Posted 09 November 2012 - 07:48 PM

Won't let me edit my post grrr

Edited by onthesquare28, 09 November 2012 - 07:48 PM.


#16 onthesquare28

onthesquare28

    UKPOLICEONLINE Regular

  • Banned
  • 383 posts
  • Gender:Male
  • Location:Thames Valley
  • Interests:Law, current affairs, politics.

Posted 11 November 2012 - 10:58 PM

A wife of an old friend rung me back in May and asked me if i was having an affair with her husband back in May. After i gave her the answer (which was no) she continued to text me for a further three days.And asked me to add her as a friend on a social network site which i did under a false name and account. I then found that over the next few months the woman had googled me, looked for information about me including my childrens names and husband, opened up accounts herself to find information on me, wrote things about me on social networking.Involved her daughter who also slandered my name is full and where i work on a social network site. i tried to inform the police several times but they said they cant do anything as it was a public domain. I then had a visit from the police who told me that i had taken a photograph in a public street of several different vehicles and her car was one of them, They gave me the warning and said if i contacted any of the family again i would be arrested. I spoke to the sergent who said there was no law on taking photos in a public place but because she had made a complaint against me taking the photo and with the comments on both facebook pages even though i had not mentioned any names , i would get into trouble should it go to court as she made the complaint . Is this right ?


How do you know this woman had googled you? How did you find this out? How did you find out she had opened accounts to find information on you? I wouldn't know how to do that myself.

#17 onthesquare28

onthesquare28

    UKPOLICEONLINE Regular

  • Banned
  • 383 posts
  • Gender:Male
  • Location:Thames Valley
  • Interests:Law, current affairs, politics.

Posted 11 November 2012 - 11:03 PM

People complain about all sorts of nonsense and because we are the police we are expected to do something about it. We cant tell people to grow up because although thats usually the best advice its not victim focused.
So we end up sending people harassment warnings and they get upset. But as they are not the 'victim' its not so important.
Sounds like you have no reason to contact them again so dont. Doing so seems to get you in trouble so dont bother


Do you "send" people harassment warnings? I thought you handed them out on the spot after the requisite number of complaints.

#18 onthesquare28

onthesquare28

    UKPOLICEONLINE Regular

  • Banned
  • 383 posts
  • Gender:Male
  • Location:Thames Valley
  • Interests:Law, current affairs, politics.

Posted 11 November 2012 - 11:11 PM

So basically a stranger who asks if you are having an affair with their husband rings you up out of the blue. They then contact you to add them as a friend on a social networking site - Why would you add them (even under a false name)? Also, with regards to the photo of the cars how did you come to photo her car - was it by accident or deliberate? Just curious because if it was me and someones partner rang me up to see if I was having an affair with their other half I would tend to leave them alone.

also what were the comments you made on Facebook and why would you do that?


If you were contacted, as you say, "out of the blue" and you were not guilty of the accusation, you may well box clever and respond to the social media request under a different name (depends on what social network site it is of course) out of curiosity, which is a natural human instinct, especially, if you feel threatened. Photographing cars, in itself, is not an act of harassment, whether deliberate or accidental, surely? You might tend to leave well alone, but you assume this person has the same psychological profile as yourself - there might be all manner of things going on in this person's life that might motivate them to behave in a manner different from a police ideal, but that doesn' t necessarily indicate they are 'up to something'.

#19 onthesquare28

onthesquare28

    UKPOLICEONLINE Regular

  • Banned
  • 383 posts
  • Gender:Male
  • Location:Thames Valley
  • Interests:Law, current affairs, politics.

Posted 11 November 2012 - 11:18 PM

ive closed that done weeks ago, however even after the police told me that she would be given the same warning , she is still writing things on her wall and putting them public obviously for my attention. yet i was told that if either made any more comments referring to each other we would be arrested. So she seems to be getting away with this doesnt she


From what you've said here, it sounds like a FaceBook account (the word "wall" is a bit of a giveaway). If you have deleted your FB account, then the only way you could see what she is writing is if she makes her profile public. If this person is causing you distress, you should report it and make a complaint to the police if they do nothing. Ask the police to go and see her about why her profile is public allowing you to see what she says about you and ask her: "Why would you do that?"....

Edited by onthesquare28, 11 November 2012 - 11:19 PM.


#20 louise64

louise64

    I'm New !

  • Resident Members
  • 16 posts

Posted 26 November 2012 - 05:23 PM

She told her husband that she had googled me .And i recieved an email from another site saying the person had viewed my profile, she used her christian name , a different surname, had no contacts at all and had opened the account only days before i got the email!!! I have already opened a false facebook account which is the one she was looking at ! as for using the same profile photos if i wore sunglasses in mine shes would put one on wearing sunglasses, if i put one on myslef when i was young she woulds too !! very creeepy !! Yes she is putting certain things on her wall as public possibly referring to me. like cartoons saying some people need to be hit on the head with a shovel, some people are like hemroids lol and comments about her cwtching her husband !! all these are puplic and nothing else is ,I was told by the police if either of us wrote anything on the walls referring to the other we would be arrested ,yet she seems to be doing it ,The latest is on her wall someone tried to gain access to her profile on search engine and she is going to the police station .!!!!




0 user(s) are browsing this forum

0 members, 0 guests, 0 anonymous users